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Parenting pet peeves on transit

Now it's your turn to weigh in on the parenting pet peeve debate!


Transit pet peeves are a subject we know well on the blog and on Facebook. We’ve also talked about talked about the challenges of taking your stroller on the bus and the ins and outs of just how you should navigate transit with your little one. But the two subjects haven’t really crossed paths, until we saw this Georgia Straight blog post called, Seven transit peeves from a new parent in Vancouver.

I encourage you to read the blog post yourself to get the author’s explanation of each peeve. Here’s the list of the seven peeves minus the explanations:

1. Able-bodied, babyless people hogging the courtesy seats

2. Bus riders who give parents dirty looks when their baby cries

3. Smokers lighting up at bus stops

4. People who rush to beat parents with strollers onto the bus

5. Aisle-blockers who seem to think a stroller can magically pass through them

6. Transit riders who think my kid’s stroller is a handrail

7. Bus drivers and passengers offering unsolicited child-rearing advice

As a parent and transit user, I can honestly say that I’ve only experienced one of these peeves. I’m not saying this author is wrong or that these other peeves don’t happen, they just haven’t happened to me as a parent who’s traveled on transit with my kid for the past two years. Considering some of the comments to the blog post, there just may are people who aren’t fond of some parents, kids and/or strollers on buses which could obviously lead to some of the peeves this post and author are referencing to.

I generally find that most riders are very accommodating of my stroller, my child and myself on transit. In fact, I’ve had some downright great experiences of people playing peek-a-boo with my kid, helping me situate my stroller and reminding me to put the breaks on my stroller wheels.

The peeve I can identify with is the third one about smoking at bus stops – well, half of it. I do see people smoking near bus shelters in Vancouver. However, when myself and my child show up at the stop they often move away from the shelter to finish their smoke, especially if I make eye contact with them.

I think it’s safe to say that most Buzzer blog readers are dedicated and frequent users of the system. Therefore, I see you all as experts in daily public transit use in Metro Vancouver. So, I’m wondering what you’re experience is, whether your a parent or not, with strollers, parents, children and riders on buses is. Do these peeves ring true for you? Are there other peeves you have as a parent or a rider who’s comes in contact with parents and strollers on the bus, or are you like me and find the experience of taking your kid on the bus a generally pleasurable one?


32 Comments

  • By Sheba, October 12, 2012 @ 7:32 pm

    I’m with you on this one Robert – I’ve NEVER seen five of those happen, and the other two an extremely limited number of times.

    It’s a personal peeve of mine about how smokers think as long as they’re outside then they can smoke wherever they want (including in marked non-smoking areas). I’ve even seen people smoking on Skytrain platforms.

    A lot of people who probably shouldn’t be there sit in the courtesy seats (such as crowds of teenagers). One of the problems is that you can’t always see when someone has a disability – I’ve been on transit (mostly the Skytrain) plenty of times where a person looked “able bodied” and then they got up at their stop and it was only then that it was obvious that they needed that seat.

    It’s a bigger issue when a parent takes up the courtesy seats with small children (out of stroller but still way to young to be out on their own). If your child is old enough to not need a stroller anymore, then you shouldn’t be sitting in the courtesy seats unless no other seats are available.

    I think a bigger issue is why some parents have an entitlement attitude – ‘I have a child so I’m more equal that you’. I’ve seen that way more often than I’ve seen someone with a stroller having trouble getting a courtesy seat on transit.

  • By Donald, October 12, 2012 @ 7:38 pm

    I am a parent and occasionally take my kids on transit, and I think the author of the article is a maybe a couple of steps up on his pedestal. I appreciate it when fellow passengers help accommodate my kids and I but it certainly isn’t my right.

    If a bus is busy for example, I’ll fold up the stroller to store under a seat and carry my kids. If it’s rush hour, I’ll use a carrier instead. Is he ready to deal with two strollers already being in the courtesy area? Or if a person on a wheelchair who gets absolute first priority to the courtesy area gets on?

    Sorry, it’s called PUBLIC transit for a reason. I still take transit because sometimes it’s a bit less troublesome and a lot more enjoyable than packing my kids in the car and playing chauffeur, even if it involves carrying an infant with my right arm, stroller on the another, and directing my toddler up the stairs of the community shuttle while getting ready to insert the transfer into the fare box with my barely free right hand.

    I do feel for him not getting enough sleep, and I also hate smokers at bus stops in general but especially when my kids or anyone’s kids are are around. I also agree, babies cry, deal with it.

  • By Kyle, October 12, 2012 @ 8:24 pm

    As a regular daily transit user, especially on crowded trolleys, the first 5, definitely occur (at least 2 per stroller).

    Only seniors who loose balance and crazy drukards would hold a baby’s stroller, but unfortunately, I’ve seen it many times.

    #7 depends on if the driver is in a good mood or not.

    Frequent occurrences include passengers giving food to the children, (a no no), Talking too loudly and intrusively about the family with the stroller, and “teaching” (or blaming) the parent when she doesn’t load properly, causing ensnarement to the parent with any of these situations.

    The problem with strollers, is that they are usually ranked the lowest in the issue of priority spacing: the list of priority goes like this: 1) wheelchairs 2) Seniors and the non-sighted 3) Pregnant women 4) Strollers 5) Able Bodied People.

  • By ???, October 12, 2012 @ 8:56 pm

    I’ve seen variations of all the peeves… The main one is blocked entrances, especially during peak usage.

    For myself, I will often flip up seats so the strollers and wheelchairs can board more quickly.

    Canada Line has a wide area for strollers, bikes and luggage, yet many parents still insist on having the strollers blocking the aisles in narrower areas of the train. Since the center doors (luggage) always open at the same spot on Canada Line, I’d like those areas clearly labeled for strollers, bikes, and airport luggage to speed loading.

  • By CREW, October 15, 2012 @ 9:59 am

    My husband takes our 2 year old on transit to daycare. In fact one of the main factors in choosing her daycare was the transit accessibility as we’re a car-free family.

    Even on crowded commuter buses the other passengers are really courteous but then he does take her in a carrier r/t stroller because of the crowding problem in their route.

    I’ve had the same experience of people smoking at bus stops, but they have always moved away when they’ve seen I’m pregnant and / or with children.

    And in my experience the aislse-blockers tend to just not realise that a stroller can’t get round them, or worse they try to move out the way, only to get more in the way.

    The only one I struggle with is when the bus driver starts driving before you’ve had a chance to put the brakes on. Others actually wait to ask you if you’ve got your brakes on.

    My best memory is of the passengers and driver who joined in with our song of “Wheels on the Bus” – the driver even honked his horn when we got to the line: “..and the horn on the bus goes honk honk honk”!

  • By Robert Willis - Buzzer Editor, October 15, 2012 @ 11:41 am

    Sheba: You make a very important point about people with invisible disabilities. It difficult to know 100% why people are sitting in the priority seating area. I know that I’ve asked if I could use the area for my child’s stroller before. I find that generally, most people will give up their seat for you.

    Donald: I couldn’t agree with you more. I use my umbrella stroller only on the bus since it’s narrow and can fold up if I need to. It can get mighty taxing to have a kid, stroller and backpack to hold the stuff that was in the stroller. However,it beats parking and finding a gas station!

    Kyle: That’s really unfortunate that you’ve witnessed people running ahead of strollers to board a bus. I love your comment about people “Teaching” parents about parenting. I find having a child in public, transit included, often means your open to unsolicited advice about almost anything! I guess parents seem very approachable to some.

    ???: Thank you for being one of the people who flips up the seats! I’ll have a good look at the signage on the Canada Line and forward your comment to be the people who look after that line. Much appreciated!

    R

  • By Robert Willis - Buzzer Editor, October 15, 2012 @ 11:45 am

    Crew: My kid loves that song! What a great operator. Thanks for sharing that. Driver’s taking off too earlier is not a good thing. I’ll look into what the training is for our operators concerning this issue.

  • By Sheba, October 15, 2012 @ 3:07 pm

    I’ll admit that I don’t tend to ride in Vancouver or during rush hour, so I’m sure I’ve missed such joys as some of these pet peeves. Still if someone is off work on maternity leave, they have the option to try to schedule around rush hour. Why travel when you know it’s going to be packed?

    I bring up invisible disabilities because I fall into that category. Sure when I’m heading out I’m probably feeling pretty good, but unless it’s a short trip there’s a decent chance that on my way home my insides are acting up, my legs have totally stiffened up and my feet are in agony. No one can see that though. Go figure I don’t make a habit of riding during rush hour if I don’t have to.

  • By Christina, October 15, 2012 @ 3:36 pm

    I will have day I ride the bus out in the Langley area every day and find I deal with all if those peeves. I hate ridding the bus for that fact I find the bus drivers to be so rude. They never help and when I call out to let them know I am getting off at the next so the candy the people come on next to wait they don’t ANC I have to end up fighting to get my stroller off and on top of that they are pissed at me.
    For some reason when you get to surrey and Langley there are rule for smoking at a bus stop I have two kids and I am always have to stand away from the stop so we don’t have to feel like we are smoking in all that smoke.

    I wait at the same stop every morning and I have the same woman that pushes my stroller out of the way do she can get on first the sad thing is the bus is empty and she does not need to rush.

    I find my self not coming out at rush hr time with my stroller any more I find it not worth it at all between the fact the bus is full and people just not wanted to get up does not make it fun to go and do things I need to do. I would rather stay home.

    I come from not and have taken the bus in a lot off city’s and I find Langley and Surrey. to to awful

  • By User, October 15, 2012 @ 5:40 pm

    @ Crew

    Amazing story, it’s great to here positive experiences on public transit like that. I know a few people who drive buses and will get a kick out of this story.

    @ Christina

    Forgive me if I mistake what you’ve said, but I am unsure about some of your sentences and the meaning.

    No offense, but this sounds like entitlement. Expecting others to change for you or to let you do things first etc gives that vibe. If you’re trying to go first in and out of the bus then you’re doing the exact same thing as them. In your eyes they are being inconsiderate, and the same would be true through their eyes. As for the driver, I could not speak about that. Each driver is different, some will be like the ones in Crews story, and some are not as pleasant. If you find them being rude, make sure you’re leaving detailed information with Customer Relations so they can follow up and correct the behavior.

    If you have the same problems with people each day, you should just adapt to it. It’s much easier to have one person adapt to their surroundings and the people you encounter daily than to ask all those people to adapt to you. Instead of fighting people to get off the bus, let them fight themselves to get off and then you calmly exit the bus. Be mindful of your surroundings and your day will be much easier. As for the smokers, well, sometimes you don’t always have the kindest of people around. Not everyone follows the rules sadly, just speak up and ask them politely to move away from the stop. There isn’t much that you can do about the smokers otherwise.

    @ All

    Unless it’s raining or unpleasant out I would like to see people with strollers wait and let others board. A person with a stroller will always get a spot unless taken by someone with disabilities (I.E higher priority). Even if the strollers got on first, they would still need to move. Even boarding after everyone else, they will still get a spot if they would anyway. It’s much more courteous to let everyone board quickly and be the last one to board, as it takes much longer than the average person. One person sacrificing a little bit of time is more logical than 5+ waiting. Again, provided it isn’t ugly out. I don’t mind waiting in the rain to reduce the chance of a baby catching a cold.

    Strollers do have limitations on buses and trains, and they are fair. It’s just how often they are enforced is the problem. If I was a driver, even if someone came on with a SUV strollers which clearly doesn’t fall into the guidelines I don’t know if I could turn them away. Your putting the child at risk (illness) because of the parents folly, I would try to educate the parent quickly hoping they are not an entitled type of parent, and let them on. Or ask that they hold their child and fold it up if possible, it would be a difficult situation to handle the right way.

    The other peeves can be fixed by being vocal. We are all humans with ears and voices, just be polite and clear. If someone is going to do the kind thing, they will, if not… well. Sometimes that’s the way it is, deal and move on.

  • By Sheba, October 15, 2012 @ 11:15 pm

    @ User – The reality is that bus drivers want wheelchairs and strollers to board first, making everyone else wait. Perhaps with the Compass Card they can eventually get rear loading on buses, so that people can walk on via the back doors while wheelchairs and strollers are entering at the front doors.

    The current guidelines for baby carriages/strollers is that if it exists, then it’s allowed on transit. I know there was a time when SUV strollers weren’t allowed but they are now. Personally I think there should be size guidelines but I’m not in charge.

  • By Eugene Wong, October 16, 2012 @ 7:05 pm

    @ User

    Thanks for gently speaking out against entitled riders. I’m just too angry to respond.

    @ Sheba

    I suspect that if we just barge in and say, “No!”, to the bus driver, and then politely say, “Thanks for the service.”, then the message will get across.

    As it is, the bus drivers break so many rules: turning on the stereo; giving automoblie drivers the right of way. I appreciate bus drivers so much, but they can make me angry at times.

    @ All

    When a bus is empty, then the fastest people should get on first. The bottom line is that some of us need to make a connection at the end. The emptiness of the bus is not an excuse to take our time. It doesn’t reflect on the urgency of the situation.

    Also, some riders might have children waiting at the end of the trip. 1 parent is not more entitled than another.

    If seniors can wait in line, then so can entitled parents.

  • By Deano, October 16, 2012 @ 9:44 pm

    I understand that strollers are necessary, and I agree with much of the logic behind the seven pet peeves, but here’s one of my pet peeves: strollers that are the size of small cars. These things can make it impossible to get past them, they block the entire end of the Mark I SkyTrain cars, they clog doorways, and so on. My family got along well with the small strollers that collapse into something not much larger than an umbrella, and a diaper bag slung over a shoulder.

  • By Robert Willis - Buzzer Editor, October 17, 2012 @ 11:18 am

    Howdy Sheba and Deano: We do have a policy about the size of stroller you’re allowed to take on transit – http://www.translink.ca/en/About-Us/Media/2007/July/TransLinks-Policy-for-People-with-Disabilities.aspx you can also go to 42 seconds of the stroller video – http://www.translink.ca/en/About-Us/Media/2007/July/TransLinks-Policy-for-People-with-Disabilities.aspx The rule is a stroller that is no longer than 2 feet x 4 feet. Believe it or not, there are strollers bigger than this. I have a stroller that fits within our guidelines, but I user a smaller umbrella stroller because it takes up less room and can fold up. Also, I wrote a previous post about strollers on transit which points out that operators can ask people not to board the bus if they feel the stroller will block the aisle. Operators can also ask parents with a stroller to give way to people with mobility devices, including walkers. – http://buzzer.translink.ca/index.php/2012/01/family-friendly-transit/

  • By Miguel, October 17, 2012 @ 12:44 pm

    Most of these strollers are simply too large to take on transit. Do you think grandma tried to get on the streetcar with one of these? http://bit.ly/Tv6zE2 No. Of course not. That was a time of common sense.

  • By Donald, October 17, 2012 @ 3:12 pm

    I took a trip downtown recently to run some errands, I didn’t feel like driving all the way there so I parked my car at Coquitlam Central Station and did a bus/Skytrain/West Coast Express circle with my 16 month old son. Since he can walk now but is still light enough that I can carry him for long periods of time, I went without stroller or carrier. It was a fun trip and only took me 2 hours altogether, probably the same time it would’ve taken me to drive. He was just resting in my arms on the way there, and was pretty active and socializing with other passengers on the way back. I’m sure he enjoys that more than being stuck in a car seat. If I have both of my kids, the umbrella stroller comes along as it’s too tiresome trying to walk with two kids without one. /endofrandomstory

    @User, now you’re saying that faster passengers are more entitled. I’ll take my place in line whether I’m by myself or have my kids with me. We’re no slower than anyone else, the most time consuming part of boarding is the few seconds it takes for the fare machine to read/write to my transfer/Faresaver. Seniors should get to go on first because standing to wait for the able bodied passengers to get on is taxing on their bodies. I don’t mind them cutting in to the front of the line from the shelter.

    @Eugene Wong, you should try not to be so angry.

  • By Sheba, October 17, 2012 @ 6:57 pm

    Robert, that’s in direct contradiction to what skytrain staff told me. I can’t remember the event (safety?), but it was one of the times that transit (mostly skytrain) staff were scheduled at various skytrain stations to meet the general public.

    I specifically asked about SUV strollers and was told that they’re allowed on transit – that baby strollers/carriages come in many sizes and all of them are allowed, there are no size restrictions.

    That being said, I routinely see SUV sized strollers on skytrain, some of them well over the 2 x 4 foot size you listed. I have never seen transit staff talk to the parent(s) about it. The last time I saw a bus driver not allow a baby carriage onto a bus would have been in the 90’s.

    I looked at the link and it also says “Strollers must be collapsible” which I doubt with most of the ones I see on transit. “Children in strollers should be removed and the strollers collapsed” – when was the last time anyone saw that???

    So I think there needs to be an educational campaign, starting with transit staff. Able bodied people need to learn who the courtesy seats are for, parents need to know that SUV’s aren’t allowed on transit, and transit staff need to enforce these things.

  • By Donald, October 17, 2012 @ 8:30 pm

    They changed the regulations years ago. Before, strollers had to be collapsed and children carried on.

    I can tell which commenters have children here and which ones don’t. Having to lug a stroller in one hand and a kid in another is far from pleasant, but I dislike it less than getting my kids in and out of the car.

    Here’s a link from an earlier Buzzer blog post showing how much more progressive Copenhagen is with transit and accommodating all riders:
    http://bit.ly/XqMUJY

  • By Stephanie, October 18, 2012 @ 12:23 pm

    Regarding the first pet peeve: Who says parents get priority over others? The child is sitting in a stroller so he/she obviously doesn’t need a seat so why should the parent get priority over someone else?

    Glad to hear some people recognize there are invisible disabilities. I am one of those people and it’s frustrating to hear people make loud comments over me about taking up seats.

  • By Sheba, October 18, 2012 @ 1:49 pm

    I pulled this info off Wiki (both are for the overall area and not just the city itself):
    Copenhagen – population 1,937,611, size 3,030 km2
    Vancouver – population 2,313,328, size 2,700 km2

    So you’re trying to compare Vancouver, which has roughly 20% higher population and 12% less area, to Copenhagen.

    Copenhagen is also “one of the most bicycle-friendly cities in the world” where “36% of all citizens commute to work, school or university by bicycle” and “Bicycle paths are often separated from the main traffic lanes and sometimes have their own signal systems.” That would mean even less people on transit.

  • By User, October 18, 2012 @ 4:50 pm

    @ Sheba

    I’ve never had a driver request someone else board first, it could just depend on the driver in that situation. There are guidelines, it’s just how often they are enforced. Drivers probably feel horrible about denying a stroller, and would most likely get a complain made against them for doing so. As people tend to have the mindset that there is no limitations on the strollers.

    @Eugene

    While I agree that the faster people should board first, in the end it doesn’t matter much. As the driver would still be waiting for everyone at that stop.

    @Miguel

    I couldn’t agree more. Common sense is dead, all though worth bringing back.

    @Donald

    To me, that’s common sense. If your child can walk, there is almost no reason for them to be in a stroller. Great story.
    I’m not saying that faster people are more entitled, I was merely getting at the point that she was expecting other people to be courteous to her and let her on first, when it goes both ways. She was upset that people are fighting there way on the bus, and the solution is just be patient and wait. Unless they are wanting to join in the rush. You are probably just as fast because you did not have a giant SUV stroller with your kids. In terms of Seniors I agree, they should be able/confident enough to go to the front of everyone without worry and board.

    I don’t have kids, but I do have nephews that I take on the bus from time to time. When they were little, I did that whole balancing act. I was like yourself though in the sense of being prepared (small stroller, carrying them when able etc) which is how more parents, in my opinion, need to be with their children on public transit.

    @ All

    Being courteous goes a long way. You may not board first, or get the best seat, but you will not be so worked about it. “Giving up” a seat to someone else, or choosing to wait as other board will make you not feel robbed of a seat or trampled on during boarding. Less stress is better than any seat, the bus isn’t going to leave until everyone boards regardless. If strollers on the bus that are over the size matter to you, speak up. If another person brings it up, the driver may not feel as terrible about enforcing it and the person with the stroller would be more inclined to believe the driver.

    User.

  • By Bus Driver Man (CMBC), October 21, 2012 @ 11:37 am

    Hey all. Thought I’d give you a driver’s perspective (at least mine!). I always prefer strollers passengers board before everyone else (unless there’ssomeone with higher priority for the space). In the past I’ve let stroller passengers wait in the general lineups if it was nice outside. What typically happened was that people would crowd the courtesy area and then I have to ask people to move. With iPods and other things stuck in people’s ears, this doesn’t always work as easily as you’d think. So now if I see a stroller in line, I direct them to the front. I find it much easier and faster to load people once the stroller is in place than the other way around. This mostly applies during rush hour. During off peak times, it makes no difference really, but I still prefer the children get on board before the general ridership. Hope that makes sense to everyone. :)

  • By User, October 21, 2012 @ 3:40 pm

    @ Bud Driver Man

    That makes sense. I had assumed that people would naturally go to the back of the bus, or recall that there was a stroller in line as to not block the isle / crowd courtesy seats.

    Thanks for the perspective.

    User.

  • By Eugene Wong, November 12, 2012 @ 7:08 pm

    @ All

    Out of curiosity, I scrolled back to see what I last wrote in this discussion. I’m shocked to see that I even thought that we should just barge onto the bus, let alone wrote it. I honestly don’t know if I was just joking or speaking hypothetically, but rest assured that even when I’m angry, growling, and stewing, I never barge on. I always stay in line, even when people cut in front of me.

    If I had to take a guess, then I would have to guess that I was just being hypothetical, and just trying to speak my mind and vent. I hope so, anyways.

  • By Anonymous, November 12, 2012 @ 7:10 pm

    @ Bus Driver Man [CMBC]

    Thanks for sharing with us your rationale for your decision! It seems that you are using psychology, which seems to work. I don’t like the necessity of it, but I do appreciate the wisdom behind it.

    @ Donald

    I certainly will try to be less angry. I definitely didn’t try to be angry. :^)

  • By Eugene Wong, November 12, 2012 @ 7:11 pm

    @ All

    Oops. The previous comment by Anonymous was by me.

  • By Eugene Wong, November 12, 2012 @ 7:17 pm

    @ Donald
    @ User

    Just for the sake of discussion, I will ignore what Bus Driver Man said. His whole solution is based on the problem of passengers not moving back. If we could find a way to do that naturally, and to let faster passengers on first, then it would be worth discussing the line up.

    The bottom line [no pun intended] is that faster people get out of the way faster, which allows the bus to pull away from the curb faster. Faster people getting on first will never affect the amount of people getting on the bus. They just improve service, when they are cooperative. There is no way to argue around that. Somebody who is slow takes longer to clear the aisles.

    Also, I highly disapprove of you both judging people behind you.

    What right do you have to assume that the guy behind you is able bodied, and can wait for the seniors? Is it taxing *only* on seniors? How do you measure who should get on first? If we put you in a lab and showed you photos of people at a bus stop, then will you be able to tell who is feeling chilly or feeling pain in their knees? Can you look at a person to see who has blisters? Some people are trying to tough it out. Who are you both to say that 1 is more deserving than another?

    I suggest that you keep an eye for the end of the line to see if there are any “worthy” people. When you see somebody, then offer to switch positions in the line. You go to the end, and let the worthy individual take your previous spot. If that isn’t close enough to the front, then go to each person, 1 by 1, and *ask* instead of shoving everybody back a spot.

    There have been times on the bus when I could barely reach a strap or a bar, and have been so tired, that I dozed off while the bus was in motion. So, yes, even though I was *not* 1 of the people that deserved a courtesy seat, you can bet that I wasn’t interested in giving up a seat at the back for others. I might have, but even still. Just remember that when *I* am tired, or in pain, or this or that, or even when I’m feeling fine, *I* want to be the person to decide who gets “my spot”.

    Could you imagine what would happen to somebody who has narcolepsy, if he fell asleep while standing up, while the bus is in motion? He might be able to stand up, I guess. Hey, you never know, right? And then when the bus stops suddenly, then the other passengers could break his fall, right? Unless, he is the only guy standing in the aisle!

    When I say this, I also say it on behalf of the people behind me.

    Honestly, even though we should show extra respect to seniors, and show extra compassion, we should also bear in mind that they are at the ends of their lives, and that they have less of a schedule, and less responsibilities than younger people do.

    For example, that young person that got left behind at the curb could be running late for the fourth time this week. Perhaps Monday had a 2 hour SkyTrain shut down. Perhaps Tuesday had a car accident that took 1 hour to clear. Perhaps Wednesday had a bus not show up, plus extra riders did show up, extending his trip an extra 30 minutes. On Thursday, you push him back a spot, and he misses his bus.

    I accuse you of being inconsiderate and judgemental. Don’t forget! He might have sore knees and blisters on his feet, because of a military march that he did on the previous weekend! Okay, I admit that that soldier should be able to stand in line on Thursday, if he got blisters on Saturday, but still.

    And all this, because you want to feel good about yourselves.

    Essentially, you are being uncompassionate, when you dictate to those behind you, and when you refuse to respect a person’s private needs and his right to say, “No!”.

  • By Eugene Wong, November 12, 2012 @ 7:25 pm

    @ All

    I honestly don’t get why these people seem to relish in the idea of making others ask to move to the front of the line, when they were already a spot closer. I don’t understand the psychology behind it. Is there an adrenaline rush? Are there endorphins in the hypocampus? I suspect that mere mortals like us will never know, because we tend to not have access to psychological research.

    I ask that you consider people who cut in line and those who support them to be irrational. They insist that they are just ordinary people, but then they push you back a spot. You remember that, when there is a door that shuts in your face. You remember the types of people who stood at the front and looked out at you in the eye, as the bus pulled away. You know what I’m talking about. The bus was empty at the back. You were at the curb for another 10 minutes in the windy rain, after a long day of work, on a bitter cold November day, while you clutched your coat tightly.

    On an note, I must say that I felt a pang of conviction the other day. Somebody invited a friend to cut in line. I asked the person to go to the back, and he went willingly, without any dirty looks. Kudos to him! The conviction came, when I realized that we tend to not reward repentant behaviour. His move to the back of the line probably needed more effort than it took for me to normally just walk to the end of the line, and I respect that. I think that from now on, I will say, “Thanks for your cooperation!”, because it is important that we extend a good hand to those who are cooperative. We want to win people over, right?

    I ask that we all speak out against people who cut in line, and reward them when they behave. It’s helps us to not look like power mongers. I highly suggest that you mention “cooperation”. That’s the part that we are showing thanks for. Going to the end of the line is what we all have to do. Winning people over is the gentle way of winning the war.

    On another note, I would ask that we be considerate of who is travelling together. That same guy was supposed to sit with his friends, but another person took that seat. It blows my mind that that other person did not even notice what happened. If we let groups sit together, then their trip will be pleasurable, and then they will be able to experience the joy of riding on transit.

  • By Kyle, November 12, 2012 @ 7:42 pm

    @ eugene;

    Regarding standing in line:

    I personally always stand at the back, unless there’s a line, for then I get to the door of the bus and step aside behind the pole to let everyone else board first. I like standing at the front of the bus.

    To increase efficiency, people with faresavers or coins, when paying, be sure to stand on the RIGHT SIDE of the entrance, so while the machine processes your ticket, or you fumble for change (Remember to have your fare ready before you board), people with passes can pass you on the left.

    With lines, there must be more control eg) at major stops eg commercial, there must be paint on the ground to signal where the line is supposed to go (like the 49 at metrotown), so that the line doesn’t change day to day, blocking throughways. The major offender of this is the 9 W/B at commercial 52094, which cuts to A&W, blocking the whole sidewalk.

    Without a painted line on the sidewalk, some stops (52012), people will just crowd the entrance, shove their way in. With a line, I find most people courteous, but without, it is sheer madness.

    To add to Eugene, if you are able healthy bodied and sitting, and the bus is full, I guarantee that there is some senior who has had a rough day that is standing. Don’t just stand up, wave so the senior sees you, then give the seat to them.

    If you are able boddied and standing, and this happens, try to spot another able healthy bodied person and kindly interogate them if it would wreck their day if they were to stand. Then, give that seat to the senior.

    Sometimes, there are some awkward moments. If you have zero energy left, and can’t stand for another second on a full bus, there are 3 choices, sit on the floor, get off the bus, or ask for a seat. To ask for a seat, people will think that you are rude and arrogant. I’m terrible at courtesy, so I hope other buzzers can pitch in at how to kindly ask for a seat.

    This is what I know: saying “thank you” after taking a seat after asking for a seat is insult to injury. Giving money for a seat is inappropriate. Staring at a person until they give you a seat is kinder, but it doesn’t work all the time.

  • By zack, December 10, 2012 @ 9:07 am

    I know this thread is getting a little old, but if someone physically pushes you of the spot you are in the line, that would be considered as assault right? Yesterday, I was in line waiting for the #106 at Edmonds station, when out of nowhere this lady come zipping through like some rocket from outer physically pushed me off the spot! >-@ Cutting in line is one thing, but physically pushing another passenger crosses way beyond the line. There should be consequences for that type of behavior.

  • By GI Joe fan, May 3, 2013 @ 5:21 pm

    I’m not a parent yet, so I’ll get that out of the way first. Now I don’t mind if a passenger with a stroller comes on the bus, and their baby is not walking yet. What bugs me, are those who have kids, well past walking age, like 2 and half and older, whom still insist on using a stroller, especially one of those ginormous ones! >:( and who still have that attitude of entitlement.

    One time I was on a bus on my way to Skytrain, there were three customers with strollers on the bus. Two had older, walking age kids. >:( Then we come to a stop where a lady on a scooter was waiting. She had to wait more, because none of the three passengers with the strollers(especially the two with walking age kids) weren’t willing to disembark and wait for the next bus, or take their kid out and fold up the stroller. I’m sue the lady on the scooter was pissed too. Aren’t scooter passengers the higher priority? What’s wrong with this picture?

    Boggles the mind. Ugh!

  • By Eugene Wong, May 4, 2013 @ 7:56 pm

    @ GI Joe fan

    What’s wrong with the picture is that feminism will continue to claim that mothers know what is best for their children and what is best for everybody else. We have 3 pieces of evidence right there. On top of that, we will continue to support it, and never question those women directly to their faces. Why would we, when they can do no wrong?

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